In his early 20s, he dreamt of how good it would be if husbands were to take home responsibilities the same way as women do.
The dreamer is Tom Beardshaw, a paternity coaching specialist with a passion for gender equality. Power Women of City caught up with him at the 'Fathers in the workplace' workshop event held in London. The workshop was hosted by HeANDShe together with Token Man and the discussion centered on how a shared responsibility can have an impact on their partners and ultimately gender equality.
Following a dream In pursuit of this dream, he became a Director of the National Fatherhood Institute and led the political lobby to introduce Paternity Leave into Law in the United Kingdom in 2003.
When you ask him how exactly children and women benefit when husbands share caring responsibilities with their wives, he sings his response like a chorus:
“Everyone benefits
“Women get greater life satisfaction, become happier, less likely to get depressed “They are more effective as parents “They are more likely to earn more money “Marriage is better”
Beardshaw has experience as a working husband and caring father. He says they managed to balance the equation very well with his wife.
“We equally divided work," adding, “I would take care of the home and our baby three and half days a week and my wife would do the same and this helped her to work on her career,” said Beardshaw.
Even now after the divorce, Beardshaw continues to share responsibility with his wife in taking care of their teenage son, who spends one half a week with him, one weekend at his place, one at his mothers.
“His mother is today a model of a successful career woman to our son,” said Beardshaw.
Breaking mis-concepts
Beardshaw dispels the misconceptions that nurturing is a task for the wife alone. “When a baby is born, no one including women has got the experience to provide care," adding, “They all have to learn and that is how they all develop competency.”
He even goes further to argue that sharing family roles between men and women is something that is now inevitable. “We are in a process of social and cultural transition and that change is a necessary and inevitable response,” he added. Plus, women to whom today’s young men are attracted have careers and will never settle for a housewife role. Coaching Dads
As part of his paternity coaching efforts Beardshaw works constantly with Banks and Legal firms in the City of London to enable them to support their male employees with families since 2005. A London School of Economics Anthropology graduate as well as a holder of a Masters in Ethics from Cardiff University, Beardshaw is passionate about paternity coaching: working with groups and individual men who are experiencing family transitions such as the birth of children. He also advocates on the value of men’s engagement with their children and family life. Plus, he is experienced in working with clients helping them to coordinate demanding careers with demanding personal lives.
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